So, on Monday I had my first hearing and I forgot to enter my appearance for the court. A real life, harmless error. The judge was friendly and entered it for me. Hey, I’m not even a lawyer yet. We all make mistakes.
Not to mention all the effort it was taking to make a sound through the laryngitis I tried so hard to overcome by drinking tea and honey and refusing to talk to anyone all weekend. I was barely squeaking out answers, and my supervisor later noticed that she didn’t think I would even show up in the transcripts because she had no idea how the microphones could possibly have picked me up.
I didn’t have the answers to every single question ready.
But, I stood there. And with poise, I didn’t blush. I didn’t look away. I said “your honor” whenever addressing the court. We got the order of protection for our client.
People assume I’m not shy and that I am confident in all social situations. A trial advocacy professor noted that I exude poise when in front of the court. I think that’s just what it is — poise. That’s what’s important to me, and that’s what I’ve learned to project. I’m rarely confident. I rarely prepare – especially for public speaking events. I’m a procrastinator who prefers to “wing it.” I also worry about what people think in an unfamiliar social setting. I can be nervous around authority figures. I am easily intimidated. But, only the inner circle really knows all these things about me, because where ever I happen to be uncomfortable, I rarely break frame on poise.
True story: This summer a woman walked into the law firm from off the street. We didn’t take her case, but she was looking for an attorney to help with a batter charge against her. A very large, round, black woman told me that she had punched a nurse in the “vagina” twice. She didn’t remember punching the nurse because she was unconscious, or having a seizure. At the end of the story she mumbled, “oh and also some prostitution.”
Our criminal law attorney laughed hysterically when I went to his office to see if he wanted her case. He kept me in his office for a few minutes to get the details, and to wax philosophically on how you can’t actually punch someone there — at least not easily. I asked if he wanted to talk to her, and he told me to send her across the street. (Another law firm, I’m assuming a frenemy must own this firm.)
As she left the other law clerks came pouring out of the office next to the main lobby. They were also laughing hysterically, and could not believe how I managed to keep a straight face. Quickly, the fact that I didn’t laugh during this whole exchange became as key of a detail as the fact that this woman claimed she punched someone in the vagina. Looking back, it was certainly one of the more interesting things that happened this summer, but we had a potential client, in off the street with a real problem.
I handled it with poise.
